When I went to Baguio for a short 4-day vacation with my fellow Jesuits, I spent the days sleeping. I was tired from work and wished I had more time. I’d wish I had larger chunks of solitude, longer hours in a day, or more days in a month: thinking that more time would help boost my spiritual life by providing time to pray. I thought that I need more of God’s bread so that I could do my jobs well, or do every good work better. I yearned for what Jesus’ listeners asked of Him in the Gospel today: “Give us this bread from heaven!” (and I beseech God with passion!)
However, a wake-up call in the form of an accident made me realize one thing: God has given me enough blessings. No need to ask for the extra! St. Paul wrote to the Corinthians: “God is able to provide you with every blessing in abundance, so that by always having enough of everything, you may share abundantly in every good work” (2 Cor 9,). God gives me all that I need, even if it isn’t all that I want. I was always asking for more. And sometimes to have more does not help us. Parents would share how they raise their children: they give them enough for each day — the right amount of food and allowance — but let the children budget what they have. But those whose children become spoiled are those whose parents give them more than enough.
God has given enough time and enough blessings. And enough time to rest — too much of it slackens me. The accident was simple: I almost hit a truck because I was sleepy! (The side mirror and the door of my car got damaged!). I often think that I need more time to work, that I lose sight of the need to sleep.
Many of us feel as though we never have enough. We need a deeper faith. We pray for a better relationship. We beg for a moving inspiration that could catapult us to change. We are always wanting — believing that when we have what we ‘lack’ we will be ready for God. However, we are never satisfied with what we have. And we will never be perfectly ready.
Perhaps we have to give time to focus on the things we have received and accept that they are enough to make us holy. Rather than focusing all our attention to what is lacking in our lives.